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Well, I’ll tell ya, this whole groomin’ thing and the drinkin’, it’s a bit of a puzzle, ain’t it? Folks talkin’ ’bout groomers usin’ alcohol, and it gets me thinkin’. What in the world are they doin’ with it? First off, I heard some of them groomers use that alcohol stuff for cleanin’, you know? Like, for their tools and such. Makes sense, I guess. Gotta keep them clippers and scissors clean, otherwise, who knows what kind of nasty stuff you’d be spreadin’ around. Them animals, they got all sorts…

Alright, let’s gab about these glass drinking straws, you know, the ones them fancy folks are using now. I seen ’em in the store the other day, shiny and all, next to them plastic ones we always been using. Makes you wonder, are they really worth the fuss? First off, they say these glass straws are safer. Safer than what, I say? We been using plastic forever, and ain’t nothing happened to us, well, mostly. But them city folks, they worry about everything. They say if your young’uns are already…

Alright, let’s talk about this Tropical Cookies stuff, whatever it is. Sounds fancy, like somethin’ them city folks would eat, but it ain’t no cookie, that’s for sure. It’s some kind of…weed, they call it. My grandson, he talks about it sometimes, all these different names and whatnot. Confusin’ as all get-out, I tell ya. So, this Tropical Cookies, they say it’s a mix of somethin’ called Girl Scout Cookies and Pineapple Skunk. Girl Scout Cookies, now that I know. Used to buy them thin mints every year from little…

Alright, let’s talk about these “tech edu cookies,” whatever they are. Sounds fancy, but I’ll try to make sense of it for ya. What in the world are Tech Edu Cookies? Well, from what I gather, these tech edu cookies ain’t somethin’ you eat, not like them chocolate chip cookies my grandbaby loves. They’re supposed to be some kinda thingamajigs mixed up with learnin’ stuff. Like, maybe they’re little computer programs or websites or somethin’ that help kids learn. I heard tell they come in all shapes and sizes, too….

Alright, so you wanna know about this Monster energy drink, huh? I ain’t no fancy doctor or nothin’, but I can tell ya what I know. Heard folks talkin’ about it, seen the young’uns drinkin’ it, so I figured I’d take a look myself. First thing’s first, that there can is full of sugar. Lordy, I tell ya, it’s like drinkin’ candy! They say there’s about 28 grams of sugar in a small can, that’s like a whole lotta sugar cubes, you know? Makes me think about all them sweets…

Alright, so, let’s talk about this Ghost Hydration stuff. I heard folks talkin’ ’bout it, seein’ it in the stores, all colorful and fancy-lookin’. So, I figured, what the heck, let’s see what all the fuss is about. First off, they got these drinks, the Ghost Hydration drinks, ready to go in bottles. You can find ’em at them big stores, like that 7-Eleven place, Kroger, Walmart, and Target. They come in all sorts of flavors, even one that they say tastes like them Sour Patch Kids candies. My grandkids…

Alright, let me tell ya ’bout this here “dessert of the month club” thing. I ain’t no fancy city slicker, but I know good eatin’ when I see it, and this here sounds like a whole lotta good eatin’! Now, from what I gather, these clubs, they send ya sweets right to yer door, every month. Imagine that! No more runnin’ to the store when ya got a hankerin’ for somethin’ sugary. They got all sorts, ya know? Cakes, cookies, brownies, them little fancy mac-a-ron things… sounds like a mouthful,…

Alright, let me tell ya ’bout this here… uh… sugar cookie almond milk latte thingy. Sounds fancy, don’t it? But it ain’t so complicated, ya hear? First off, they got this… espresso stuff in it. Now, I ain’t no coffee expert, but this espresso, it’s like strong coffee, real strong. They say the Starbucks folks use some kinda blonde roast, but heck, you can use whatever coffee you got, long as it’s strong enough. I reckon you could even use that strong coffee you make in that there pot, you…

Well, let me tell ya, there’s nothin’ quite like a good ol’ drink from a mate gourd. I been around long enough to know that this here drink, mate, it’s been around for ages. Folks down South, from them faraway lands, they been usin’ this calabash gourd for their yerba mate for years and years. Now, you might wonder, what’s so special ’bout this gourd and all? I reckon it’s the way the drink tastes and how it makes ya feel, a real treat, I say! You see, when you…

Well now, if ya ever been to the beach or sat round the bonfire on a hot summer night, ya might’ve had a drink in your hand that had that sweet, tropical taste. Yeah, I’m talkin’ about them Malibu can drinks. Now, these little cans of goodness ain’t like them hard liquors ya usually find in a bottle. Nope, these ones are made for easy drinkin’. First off, let me tell ya a bit about this Malibu drink. It’s got a nice coconut flavor, real sweet-like, but don’t let that…