Adwan

Alright, listen up, y’all! We’re gonna talk about somethin’ everyone knows a little somethin’ about – drinkin’! Yeah, you heard me right. And not just any drinkin’, we’re talkin’ about them different levels of drinkin’, the kinda stuff you see on that Tumblr thing all the young’uns are always lookin’ at. Don’t ask me how I know, I just do, okay? So, first, you got that “social sippin’” level. That’s when you’re just havin’ a little somethin’ with your friends, you know? Maybe a beer or two, a glass of…

Alright, alright, let’s talk about this keto cottage cheese stuff. My young’uns told me it’s good for ya, keeps the sugar down or somethin’. I don’t know much about these fancy diets, but I know good food when I taste it. And if it helps me keep my ol’ bones movin’, well, that’s just a bonus. So, they say cottage cheese is the way to go for this “keto” thing. Sounds like somethin’ my grandma used to make, though she didn’t call it no fancy names. Just plain ol’ cheese,…

Alright, let’s talk about this Jhudora’s Ruinous Recipes thing, ya know? It’s a cookbook, like them fancy city folks use, but this one’s different, real different. This ain’t no Betty Crocker stuff, I tell ya. It’s from some fairy, Jhudora they call her, and let me tell you, she ain’t no sunshine and rainbows type. Now, I ain’t never seen a fairy, but folks say Jhudora is a dark one. Means she likes things spooky and maybe a little bit…well, ruinous, like the book says. So, you ain’t gonna find…

Alright, let’s talk about this steak and lobster dinner, you know, the fancy stuff. I ain’t no fancy cook, but I know what tastes good, ya hear? First off, you gotta get yourself some good steak. Not that tough, chewy stuff. I’m talkin’ about somethin’ tender, somethin’ that melts in your mouth like butter. They call it filet mignon sometimes, or somethin’ like that. Sounds fancy, but it’s just good meat, that’s all. Now, for the lobster. Oh boy, lobster. I remember the first time I had it. Big ol’…

Alright, let’s talk about them dinner plates, you know, the ones we use every day for eatin’. Folks call ’em “standard dinner plates,” sounds fancy, but it just means the regular ones, not them itty-bitty salad plates or them huge serving platters. Now, from what I hear, these plates, they’re usually ’bout 10 to 12 inches wide. That’s, like, from one side to the other, straight across. I ain’t never measured ’em myself, mind you. Just eyeball it, you know? But them folks who make these things, they say 10…

Alright, let’s talk about this red dessert wine, you know, the sweet stuff you drink after dinner. I ain’t no fancy wine expert or nothin’, but I know what I like, and I know what tastes good. So, listen up, and I’ll tell ya what I know. First off, they tell me that sweet wine, well, it comes from grapes that are extra sweet, makes sense, right? Like, if you want somethin’ sweet, you gotta start with somethin’ sweet, ain’t no gettin’ around that. They do somethin’ to the fermentin’,…

Alright, let’s talk about them football cookie cutters, ya know? I seen ’em on the internet, all sorts of shapes and sizes. Like, some are just plain footballs, but then you got the helmets, the jerseys, even little sneakers and trophies! My grandkids, they love cookies, and football, so I figured, why not combine the two? First off, what is a “cookie cutter” anyway? Well, it’s somethin’ you use to make cookies all the same shape, ain’t it? Like, you press it down on the dough and bam you got…

Alright, let’s gab about these small drink machines, you know, the ones that spit out sodas and stuff. I seen ’em all over, from the big city stores to little corner shops. They ain’t all the same, that’s for sure. Some are itty-bitty, like them IndusBay Mini Vending Machines. My grandkid, he’s got one, puts in them toy coins or swipes a card, then picks his drink. Cute little thing, but don’t hold much. Then you got bigger ones, like that hOmeLabs Beverage Refrigerator. Now that one, it holds a…

Alright, let’s talk about this “skinny bitch drink” thing. I ain’t never heard of such a fancy name for a drink before. Back in my day, we just drank what we had, ya know? But I guess times have changed, and folks are all worried about their figures and whatnot. Heck, I ain’t complaining. If you wanna drink something that won’t make ya belly stick out, that’s your business. So, from what I gather, this “skinny bitch drink” is basically a vodka soda. Now, vodka, that’s strong stuff. My grandpappy…

Alright, let me tell ya about this “frozen dairy dessert” thing. You see it in the stores, looks like ice cream, but it ain’t always the same, ya know? It’s like, they kinda look alike, but when you get down to it, there’s a bit of a difference. So, what is this frozen dairy dessert anyhow? Well, it’s a cold treat, somethin’ sweet you eat when it’s hot out, or whenever you feel like it, I guess. They make it with milk and cream, just like ice cream, but here’s…