Darnell

Well, howdy there! Let me tell ya somethin’ ’bout makin’ some real good banana bread, ya know, the kind that makes your mouth water just thinkin’ about it. Folks call it “Joys Banana Bread,” but to me, it’s just plain good eatin’. First things first, you gotta have them bananas. Don’t go pickin’ no green ones, ya hear? Them bananas gotta be ripe, real ripe, almost black, that’s when they’re sweet as sugar. I seen some folks use fancy words like “maintaining moisture,” but all that means is them bananas…

Alright, let’s talk about these “drink lager shirt” things, you know, the shirts you wear when you’re sippin’ on that good ol’ lager. I ain’t no fancy writer or nothin’, but I know a thing or two about comfy clothes and a good time. So, if you’re lookin’ for a shirt to wear while you’re enjoyin’ a cold one, listen up. First off, what in the world is a “lager shirt” anyway? Well, from what I gather, it’s just a shirt, ya know, like a t-shirt or somethin’, that you…

Alright, let’s talk about this heavenly Oreo dessert. I ain’t no fancy cook or nothin’, but I know what tastes good. This here dessert, it’s somethin’ special, easy enough for even a clumsy old gal like me to whip up. First off, you gotta get yourself some Oreos. Not the fancy kind, just the regular ones. You know, the black and white cookies. Get a big ol’ pack, ‘cause you’re gonna need ‘em. Then, you need some butter. Real butter, the kind that melts all nice and smooth. Don’t go…

Alright, let’s yak about this here green dessert geek bar flavor thing. I ain’t no fancy city slicker, but I know what tastes good, ya hear? Now, they call it “Green Desert,” which sounds right peculiar to me. Deserts ain’t green, last I checked. But these vape folks, they like them fancy names. Makes it sound all mysterious and whatnot. I reckon it’s just their way of saying it’s got some kinda green fruit in it. So, what’s it taste like? Well, from what I gathered, this here green dessert…

Well, let me tell ya, findin’ them gluten-free, dairy-free desserts ain’t always easy, no sir. It’s like lookin’ for a needle in a haystack sometimes, you know? But don’t you worry none, I’m gonna tell ya what I know, and we’ll figure this thing out together. First off, what in the world are we talkin’ about? Gluten-free, dairy-free desserts. That means no wheat stuff and no milk stuff. Sounds fancy, but it just means they took out some things that bother some folks’ bellies. For some reason, lots of people…

Well, let’s talk about these here dinner knives, shall we? You know, the ones we use every day to eat our supper. Ain’t nothin’ fancy, but they gotta be sharp enough to cut a good piece of meat, right? First off, you gotta understand, a dull knife is a dangerous knife. Yeah, you heard that right. When it’s dull, you gotta push harder, and that’s when you slip and cut yourself. Happened to my old man more times than I can count. So, keepin’ them knives sharp, that’s important. Now,…

Alright, alright, let’s gab about them…what’s it called… peppermint rumchata recipes. Yeah, that fancy stuff. You know, the kind them city folks drink. First off, what the heck is this “RumChata”? Sounds like somethin’ my old mule woulda coughed up after eatin’ too much hay. But they say it’s got rum in it, and cream, and… flavors. Flavors, huh? Like when you mix up a bunch of leftovers and hope for the best, I reckon. So, this peppermint bark kind… sounds kinda like them fancy candies they sell at the…

Alright, alright, let’s talk about this here complete turkey dinner, you know, the whole shebang. I ain’t no fancy chef or nothin’, but I know how to put a good meal on the table, the kind that fills your belly and makes you feel all warm inside. First off, you gotta get yourself a turkey. Don’t go gettin’ one of them tiny little birds, unless you’re only feedin’ a couple of folks. Get a good-sized one, big enough to feed everyone and have some leftovers. You know, for makin’ sandwiches…

Alright, listen up, y’all. We got that leftover smoked chicken, and we ain’t gonna let it go to waste, no sirree! I’m gonna tell ya how to make some good grub outta that bird, stuff that’ll fill ya up and make ya smack your lips. First off, we gotta talk about shredding that chicken. You know, pull it apart with your hands, get all that juicy meat off the bones. Don’t be shy, get in there! Once it’s all shredded up, the world’s your oyster, or chicken, I guess. Heh….

Alright, let’s talk about these Emperador cookies. I ain’t no fancy writer or nothin’, just gonna tell ya how it is, like I’m chattin’ with ya over the fence. First off, they call this thing the “ruler of all sandwich cookies.” Well, ain’t that somethin’? Sounds mighty important, like the king of the cookie world or somethin’. But is it really? We’ll see. Now, they got all sorts of flavors, I hear. Chocolate, that’s a good one. And lime? That’s a bit strange, ain’t it? I ain’t never had no…