Cookies

Alright, let’s talk about this cookie sheet rack thing, you know, the thing you put them cookies on after they come outta the oven. I ain’t no fancy baker, but I do know a thing or two about gettin’ them cookies cooled down right. First off, why do you even need one of them racks? Well, see, if you just leave them cookies on that hot pan, they gonna keep cookin’ on the bottom and get all hard and burnt. Nobody wants a burnt cookie, right? So, you gotta get…

Alright, listen up, y’all. We gonna talk ’bout them cookies, yeah, them Cookie Run Tower of Adventure cookies. Which ones is good, which ones ain’t worth a lick. I seen some folks gettin’ all confused, so I’m gonna set it straight, just like I tell my chickens which way to peck corn. Now, some cookies, they’re real strong, like my old mule Bess. We call them the S-tier cookies. These are the ones you wanna get your hands on, no matter what. They hit hard, they last long, they just…

Alright, let’s talk about these here Cookie Monster Cupcakes. You know, the blue ones? Yeah, them. My grandkids, they love ’em. Always beggin’ me to make ’em. And you know what? They ain’t so hard to make, even for an old gal like me. First thing’s first, you gotta get your stuff together. Flour, sugar, eggs… the usual. And don’t forget the blue food colorin’! That’s what makes ’em look like that Cookie Monster fella on the TV. The kids, they go crazy for it. Now, I ain’t got no…

Well, look at that, “cookie mold,” huh? Sounds fancy, but it ain’t nothin’ but somethin’ you use to make them cookies look pretty. You know, the kind you see at the store, all shaped like flowers and stars and such. My grandma used to have some, the old kind, made of wood. Heavy as a rock, they were. But they made the best lookin’ cookies you ever did see. Now, these young folks, they got all sorts of cookie molds. Plastic ones, metal ones, even that newfangled silicone stuff. They…

Well now, let me tell ya ’bout this “Cookie King.” Sounds fancy, don’t it? Like some big shot who makes cookies. But lemme tell ya, good cookies ain’t about fancy names, it’s about good ol’ fashioned tastiness. What kinda cookies they got? They got this “Sugar Cookie,” plain and simple, I reckon. Good for the young’uns, they like that sweet stuff. Then there’s this “Triple Chocolate Walnut Chocolate Chip.” Now that sounds like a mouthful! Chocolate and nuts, must be pretty rich. They say they got more flavors comin’, but…

Alright, let’s gab about this here “cookie hoodie” thing. I ain’t no fancy fashionista, mind you, but I know comfy when I feel it, and cookies? Well, everybody loves cookies, ain’t that right? So, a hoodie with cookies on it? Sounds kinda fun, I reckon. First off, what the heck is a hoodie anyway? It’s one of them sweatshirts with a hood, you know, like what the youngsters wear all the time. Keeps you warm, and that hood? Good for keeping the wind outta your ears, or hidin’ your face…

Alright, listen up, y’all. We’re gonna make somethin’ called “cookie dough overnight oats.” Sounds fancy, huh? Don’t you worry none, it’s easier than pie. And healthier too, I reckon. We ain’t usin’ no eggs or nothin’ like that, so you don’t gotta fret about gettin’ sick. It’s all about oats and stuff, good for your belly, you know? First off, you gotta get yourself some oats. Not the quick-cookin’ kind, the regular ones. I like the thick ones, they got more chew to ‘em. You know, the ones that look…

Alright, let’s talk about this cookie decorating projector thing, ya know, the thingamajig that helps you draw on cookies. I ain’t no fancy baker, but even I gotta admit, some of them cookies folks make are purdy. And this projector thing, well, it seems like it might make things a whole lot easier, even for an old gal like me. First off, what in the tarnation is a cookie decorating projector? From what I gather, it’s like a little flashlight, but ‘stead of just shinin’ a light, it shines a…

Well, let me tell ya, them cookie decorating classes, they ain’t just for fancy folks, ya know? I seen all sorts of people at them things. Young, old, city slickers, and even some country bumpkins like me…well, maybe not exactly like me, but you get the drift. It’s all about makin’ cookies look pretty. Not just tastin’ good, mind you, but lookin’ good too. Like them fancy cakes you see in the store windows, but smaller, ya know? First off, they teach ya about that icing stuff. They call it…

Alright, let’s talk about this here cookie cutter muzzle brake thingy. I ain’t no gun expert, ya hear? But I know a thing or two about fixin’ stuff and makin’ it work better. So, if you’re lookin’ to put one of these on your shootin’ iron, I’ll tell ya what I know. Don’t expect no fancy words, though. I talk plain. First off, what the heck is a cookie cutter muzzle brake? Sounds like somethin’ you’d use in the kitchen, right? Well, it ain’t. It’s a thingamajig you stick on…